IMPOSSIBLE
My name is Véronique. I was born in a small town in the south-east of France. I got married very early and went to live with my husband in Brittany. He was in the army. Between his long absence and our geographic location, I was rather isolated. After all of his long sea missions, our reunions were always rebuilt. His stopovers were punctuated by parties, reunions, and a great amount of alcohol. This situation seems normal to me, until I started to feel his relation with drink as problematic. Our discussions were violent. The word at his departure. I was able to express my difficulties to my family.
Sadly, they always remind me of my responsibilities to maintain my household and keep my marriage working. After all, I lived as a child in a family where alcohol was very present. I deeply love this man and I had to deal with his addiction.
AWARENESS
One day, when I was 8 month pregnant, after a discord on my behalf, my husband violently slapped me. I was standing on top of the stairs and I did not feel capable of answering his slap by fear of tipping over and jeopardizing my pregnancy. This first type of physical violence opened my eyes. It was not acceptable. I needed to do something.
THE CHALLENGE
I deployed everything I could to improve the situation and get us out of this violence. I needed to save my love. Doctor appointment, psychologist appointment alone, in couples. We needed to talk, to put the world, to exchange, to unblock and to stop this process. Our family widened with a second child. Sadly, all of his sea departure and his long absence did not help to deepen our healing. Alcohol was more and more present, violence that came with it as well.
THE SPUR
One day, my three year old son came to me, held me in his arms while saying “it’s nothing mama, it’s nothing. It is going to be okay now.” My son just protects me.
I'M_POSSIBLE
While during the summer vacation, we visited my family in the south-east. I was exhausted by this situation. For my birthday, with around twenty guests, , I received a nth slap. I thought back on the word of my son, of my very young child. Then, I simply told him that it was over. That I will not go back to Brittany and that my children and I will stay here, far away from him. It was over. I will never accept a touch of violence. Now, everything is to rebuild.
Illustrations © Amélie Orhant